Jail Break

Our pet snail is on the lam.

"Pet snail? I didn't know you had a pet snail," you say. Well, we didn't. Not until a week ago. We were up at the cabin, and I turn around while cooking to see a snail sneaking across the top of a bag a celery. Now, given that the cabin is usually the same temperature inside as out, I have to assume we packed this little bugger up there with us somehow. I have to assume he (she?) was purchased at the grocery store, and took a warm little ride up to Aitkin. Yum.

Now, I am not exactly the kind to bring any random animal (especially a slimy, not very cute one) into my house (especially a home that is going on the market), but what ELSE was I supposed to do with this little guy? I can't put him outside. It's -12 degrees out there! I might as well just step on him if I'm going to do that.

So, he went into a tupperware after the children all got there 10 minutes of checking him out. I have thrown a random lettuce leaf, blueberry and splashes of water at him, pretending that I know how to take care of a snail. The only website I referenced started with "Your snail can get very bored, so be sure to provide it with a fun, interesting environment..." Dude, it's a slug with a shell. How bored can it get??

Well, this morning, the snail is loose. The foil on top of the tupperware was akimbo, and he is gone. I walked out the door 3 minutes later to head for work, all 3 big kiddos on their hands and knees, trying to find a slime trail to follow.

This is what I get for mocking his boredom. For his final revenge, I am sure his shriveled, lifeless body will be found by a prospective buyer...